Quotes - Step Three

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Chapter 3

Page 39 to 41

Page 39

dependence was their chief source of strength.

So how, exactly, can the willing person continue to turn
his will and his life over to the Higher Power? He made a
beginning, we have seen, when he commenced to rely upon
A.A. for the solution of his alcohol problem. By now,
though, the chances are that he has become convinced that
he has more problems than alcohol, and that some of these
refuse to be solved by all the sheer personal determination
and courage he can muster. They simply will not budge;
they make him desperately unhappy and threaten his new-
found sobriety. Our friend is still victimized by remorse and
guilt when he thinks of yesterday. Bitterness still overpow-
ers him when he broods upon those he still envies or hates.
His financial insecurity worries him sick, and panic takes
over when he thinks of all the bridges to safety that alcohol
burned behind him. And how shall he ever straighten out
that awful jam that cost him the affection of his family and
separated him from them? His lone courage and unaided
will cannot do it. Surely he must now depend upon Some-
body or Something else.

At first that "somebody" is likely to be his closest A.A.
friend. He relies upon the assurance that his many trou-
bles, now made more acute because he cannot use alcohol
to kill the pain, can be solved, too. Of course the sponsor
points out that our friend's life is still unmanageable even
though he is sober, that after all, only a bare start on A.A.'s
program has been made. More sobriety brought about by
the admission of alcoholism and by attendance at a few
meetings is very good indeed, but it is bound to be a far
cry from permanent sobriety and a contented, useful life.

Page 40

That is just where the remaining Steps of the A.A. program
come in. Nothing short of continuous action upon these as
a way of life can bring the much-desired result.

Then it is explained that other Steps of the A.A. pro-
gram can be practiced with success only when Step Three
is given a determined and persistent trial. This statement
may surprise newcomers who have experienced noth-
ing but constant deflation and a growing conviction that
human will is of no value whatever. They have become
persuaded, and rightly so, that many problems besides
alcohol will not yield to a headlong assault powered by
the individual alone. But now it appears that there are cer-
tain things which only the individual can do. All by him-
self, and in the light of his own circumstances, he needs
to develop the quality of willingness. When he acquires
willingness, he is the only one who can make the decision
to exert himself. Trying to do this is an act of his own will.
All of the Twelve Steps require sustained and personal
exertion to conform to their principles and so, we trust,
to God's will.

It is when we try to make our will conform with God's
that we begin to use it rightly. To all of us, this was a most
wonderful revelation. Our whole trouble had been the mis-
use of willpower. We had tried to bombard our problems
with it instead of attempting to bring it into agreement with
God's intention for us. To make this increasingly possible is
the purpose of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, and Step Three opens
the door.

Once we have come into agreement with these ideas, it is
really easy to begin the practice of Step Three. In all times

Page 41

of emotional disturbance or indecision, we can pause, ask
for quiet, and in the stillness simply say: "God grant me
the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage
to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the differ-
ence. Thy will, not mine, be done."